This is always a touchy subject but it’s one close to my heart, often I’d keep the sorrow to myself but there are times when it just has to be released and it’s a site because I can’t for the life of me control myself. But there’s always comfort in the good memories I learnt that the hard way when I lost near enough 7 members of my family in the space of 4 years. It’s a lot to bear but I don’t tell the whole truth sometimes out of the fear that I’d be treated like a charity case, I’m black so best believe I’d fit the stereotype -_- I lost two grand-aunts, grand-father (who meant the world to our family), cousin, uncle (who was like a dad), another uncle and my grand-mother (from my dad’s side). So much grief, and people wonder how I don’t go crazy.
It’s amazing how belief in an afterlife can be incredibly comforting at troubling times. As a family we are all united in the love we have for God (there I go preaching again). The question of resurrection has always fascinated me; as a christian, there’s questions that I still ask and only a being with a higher understanding than I can answer and I’m aware that human knowledge is limited. But great truth came to me in a quote by Albert Einstein (I should know its on a poster I have in my room) ‘Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world'( Before you Einstein fans hound me down I’m aware that quote is probably not his original words but it probably carries the same message so BACK OFF O_O) Escapism has to be our greatest tool because it helps us deal with emotions too great to bear, but it’s the right memories with the right attitude that can get you out of any emotional low. AND MINE HAPPENS TO BE THE 90’s!!!! as a kid the music just always made me happy; so happy that I’d either sing or move uncontrollably (which we now call dancing) But hey growing up sucks but I still have the memories on the inside and that gives me great comfort.
On Saturday I took a shortcut to the studios via a church cemetery (which before I wouldn’t dare walk through due to my early apocalyptic way of thinking) But I remember my mum (who’s a nurse) tell me that the dead are the most peaceful people you’ll ever meet, I used to laugh and quiver at the same time at the thought but she was right, I walked through and no zombie attack. So the christian message of resurrection came to my mind instantly so I was like JESUS SHOW ME THE LIGHT! and I looked carefully and was completely gob smacked! Of course spring is a time when everything blossoms but THAT’S IT! what we thought of as no longer existent suddenly springs back up to life! If not in the afterlife then in our memories (I won’t tell you what I believe but I’m sure you can make an educated guess) So yeah life may suck if it looks like all we do IS DIE, but it’s the living part that counts so LOVE LIFE!!!!